people who don’t like Pirates of the Caribbean
people who don’t like Johnny Depp
people who think they’re right about everything
people who don’t look in the mirror before going out
people who clearly haven’t showered in awhile
I hate it. I absolutely DESPISE myself. I realize I’m the biggest piece of shit in the world. Stop telling me. I already fucking know. I hate everything about my cowardly self. I. Hate. Me.
Jessica is right to say I deserve much worse than hell. She is 100% correct. I fucked her over because I’m too much of a pussy to face my problems.
I truly believe there is something wrong with me mentally that makes me such a selfish sociopath.
I’m bankrupt. But that’s a secret between you and me, alright followers? I somehow managed to piss away 7 grand since July. I have absolutely nothing to show for it. I have $300 to my name. I saved for 3 years to have that 7 grand and I lost it in 6 months. Go me.
I hate my friends and I’m pretty sure they hate me. I’m okay with that. There is nothing I can do to change it.
I have accepted that I’m never going to have the life I dreamt of. I am destined for something much lower. I’m okay with that. There is nothing I can do to change it (there was, but after the events that have transpired I don’t think that is much of a possibility.)
I run with the scum of the earth now. None of them are doing anything with their lives and they have no plans to change that. The support they offer me is “damn man that sucks.” Those are my “friends.”
I’m homeless. I do not have a fixed address. I just crash at people’s houses until they get sick of me. I can’t get a place of my own because I’m broke.
I lost the best job I’ve ever had because I was depressed. I wallowed in my sadness that Jessica went away and I lost my job at FedEx. I’m fucking retarded.
I can feel myself getting stupider. I can hear it in the way I talk.
I hate being jack. It’s almost unbearable to me now. I’m considering selling the costume. This sparrow tattoo disgusts me every time I look at it.
Stop telling me how fucked up I am. I already know. You need to accept it. I have accepted who I am and who I will most likely be for the rest of my life.
I’m the bad guy.
Accept this and then give up on me. You can’t fix me if I am the problem.
sank-the-seine said: Or go to Deja Brew tonight if you're off. I'm going to be there from 8 til whenever, probably late.
I will see you tomorrow.